Texting Love vs. Texting To-Dos

I’ve been spending some time considering my words in a fresh way. Yikes, just as difficult as it sounds. Am I speaking love and truth or gripes and gossips? As I’m crawling my way through the 30 Day Kindness Challenge I’m considering how I can be intentional in speaking words of encouragement, love and adding to that person’s value instead of critiquing, giving demands, and so on.

I was really touched by this practical way to apply kindness in the hurry of daily from The Art of Simple’s post by Crystal Ellefsen  ;


Okay, so maybe “less” isn’t totally accurate. But, we have made some shifts in what we text about*.

Previously, I confess, I would often text him things like, “tonight we need to talk about X,” or other non-urgent family-scheduling questions. The reality is that both of us are working and it’s not helpful to be interrupted by incomplete information about a decision we really just need to discuss in person.

Now, if it’s money/budget or scheduling related, we email each other at our personal (not work) email address. When there are things we need to discuss, I just keep a running list in the Notes app on my phone about what we need to discuss that evening. It has been so helpful to keep the sort of “business items” separate so that we can address them together when we’re both focused on it.

Now, our texting during the day is more signs of affection, maybe a funny moment that happened, or photos of kids, without the intermingled To Do sort of items.

I love it! What a fantastic way to speak love to him in the everyday, still find a way to organize thoughts like the family conversations we need to have, and spread kindness instead of demanding to-dos. This is something I’m going to put into practice with Google Keep to catch all the things we do have to sort through and plan, but  more texts with silly flirts and telling my hubby just why I think he is so awesome.

How do you and your partner keep the lines of communication open? Do you have similar tips of how you speak love routinely versus only the monotony of the family agenda? Share with us, let’s use our words like honey to sweeten the soul.

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